"THERE ARE NO WOMEN MADE FOR MARRIAGE IN NAIROBI ANYMORE", HE SAID.

The highlight of my weekend was an abrasive young man who offered to buy me a Toyota Vitz.

The gentleman in question was obviously on a little more tipple than he needed. A very patient me sat and listened to him as he went on and on about his VX, his millions, how he went to the President's former school and, if I agreed to be with him, our children would go to an international school.

My problem wasn't that he wanted to buy me a vitz, (well maybe a little)  it was the disgust at his rather brash and unnecessary flaunting of his wealth, (or his fathers).  I kept thinking to my self why I wasn't just shooing him off to do what I went to do, listening to the incredibly talented DJ Adrian on a Friday night at Queens. He spoke flawless Sheng, which I thought was cool, and told me that he was a well educated and wealthy young man.

Naturally I was put off by his display of a hangover from teenage bravado, but engaged him just to understand he had to talk Money so fast, I'm told however, it's the new money fever. 

No romance without finance, perhaps? 

The conversation surprised me as much as it entertained me. And I wondered, at what point does the question about money, which sometimes equals stability, or provision or whatever you would like to call it come in? Do we women only date men with money? If you're a woman, would you date a man who earns less than you? If you're a man would you date a woman who earns more than you? If the answer is no, why not? 

I'm all for comfort and a wealth.  I love to travel to exotic locations, fine dining and Shop on Net-a porter, but it does not have to be the man's role to do this. If I can afford it, I will, because every woman has dreams that need money to be achieved. In as much as it is great to have a guy with cash,  it was such turn off to meet one that was so brattish about his. 

As an unmarried woman ( FYI after 30 you stop being single and start being unmarried) I have found that Nairobi has its fair share of amazing men, dead beat dads and the usual serial player. Every Nairobi woman has a story that may or may not include the three characters. Perhaps even in that order. And given their role, the money talk has been an issue. Some are generous, some are penny pinchers, some are honestly living their best life within their budget.

My young new friend told me "There are no women made for marriage in Nairobi anymore, because all they care is about money and status". I asked him whose fault it was, if his idea of asking a woman out was to share his bank account details, minus the credit card and PIN number, of course. I digress :-)

I'd had a similar conversation in the near past with a young college student who said he couldn't date a college girl, even if he wanted to because they're all about big cars, big money and shopping trips which a regular college boy would not afford.

Money talks. Perhaps. 

The flip side though is that there are many incredible women in Nairobi who work hard, have made their money and are living their dream, but in this dating world, that they seem to be having more money is a problem in itself. The dating pool becomes much smaller (but then again, the world is an Oyster, right?)

I've heard a story about a lady who sold her Prado and bought a March in order to 'Repackage herself' for marriage, and another who bought a vita to go for dates and would use her BMW for work so she could be eligible. 

It's a subject we've had several gags about with friends, and oft times it really never has a happy ending. It is the same reason why some women have to tone down in boardrooms and sits coy and sips her Fanta orange quietly when she meet his boys, so that she can seem more calm and polite. ( read marriageable). 

I mean I had had good jobs and had side gigs for more than 10 years, I was honestly tickled by this young man's ideas of taking me to Equity bank the next day for us to buy the Vitz, hopefully the beginning of a beautiful courtship.

Questions about money can never be conclusively addressed, and I bid him goodbye, however, I was plesantly surprised when he asked to walk me out.

I didn't drive out in a Vitz.

Priceless.